By: Health and Wellness Program Work Study 

February is known as the month of love and is the perfect time to exhale and embrace love and care for yourself and others. How do we cultivate self-love, or using a different term, self-compassion in ourselves?  

Cultivating self-compassion begins by treating yourself as you would treat a good friend who is going through something similar. You offer yourself the same kindness and sympathy that you would offer your friend. We also start by ceasing the negative self-talk that makes us say, “I always fail” or “I’m no good at this.”  

Self-compassion is not just positive affirmations, meditations, expensive hobbies, and fancy retreats. Self-compassion is intervention when you need it and ensuring you are taking care of yourself just as well as you would someone else. We want to make sure you know that you are worth taking the time to settle yourself and be nice to yourself. It’s a matter of your overall health.  

Dr. Kristen Neff, the creator of the Self Compassion Scale, defines self-compassion as extending compassion towards oneself in instances of perceived inadequacies, failure, or general suffering. In her work, she shares the three main components of self-compassion are:  

3 Components to Compassion  

• The tendency to be caring and understanding to self.  
• Recognizing and understanding that all humans are flawed, imperfect, fail, and make mistakes.  
• Being aware of one's present moment experience in a clear and balanced manner so one neither ignores nor reunites on disliked aspects of themselves. Ultimately realizing that compassion can be extended toward self in circumstances that are out of your control or are of your own actions.  

Learn more by visiting Dr. Neff’s work at https://self-compassion.org. 

Find our next article in the March Student Success Newsletter, discussing self-care, the myth that self-care is only for the affluent, and self-care/compassion across cultures.